I was being stalked . . .

By the word of the year!!!

I started seeing these mentioned in post around the end of 2008. I thought “what a neat idea, a theme for the year …”

Not so quick. Picking a word for the year was harder than I would have thought. There are so many! Easy picks like peace, but, for me, that is tooooo beauty pageant sounding. Perseverance came to mind, but our family has come through so much fire the past several years, it did not seem appropriate. Too dark for this year in light of the past. And thankfully I saw it had been snatched up. Change came to mind. With Traveler graduating and moving on to her next niche in life, and with the economy and with the boys finishing another year of school, and, well there is always change! But I don’t really embrace change, at least not of late.

I decided it was too much pressure. So that was it. Not another thought going in that direction . . . but it kept showing up! Everyone is doing it!!! Peer pressure at its best . . .

The second week of January, we started a new book in the Sunday night Bible study group. The book is part of the Companions in Christ books and it is “The Way of Discernment.” I love that this book was picked!

This year there are plenty of decisions to be made. There is also, an inner struggle for me dealing with differences of perspective or interpretation that I cannot discuss with the loved one that I am having this with, and they don’t realize that I am wrangling with this (I don’t want to throw a wrench into things). I have a child that will be driving and working. This will lead to changes in the dynamics of our home, in his visits to his dads and with more opportunities for him to make decisions – choices between right and wrong. Many more weighty issues come to mind and some are quite heavy.

As I was studying this week’s lesson, I was overcome with joy with many of the scriptures and guidance it is offering. It spoke of the fruits of our Spirit and about turning the gaze inward to see if we are in fact, embracing and nurturing these gifts inside so that we may be able to outwardly share them. There was a quote, from around the time of World War II, found in a Swedish diplomat’s prayer journal “If only I may grow: firmer, simpler – quieter, warmer.” I liked that. I liked the character that represented. For me it represents God living in me and through me.

And while I was reading and absorbing all that was being said, the light bulb came on and blinded me. My word! What I need for this year. What I need, in order to give to others this year. What I need to feel stronger through the decisions and changes to come.

Discernment

So folks, there you have it, that is my word.

Discernment, I will seek this gift of God so that I might be able to grow firmer, simpler, quieter and warmer. To share the love of God and live my life toward the goals he has for me. . .

And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age.
Matthew 28:20

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